


Love Goes Through A Man's Stomach

by sleepyoceanprince (fynndin)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bachelorette Party, Canon Typical Swearing, Getting Together, M/M, Rhodey Is a Good Bro, Stripper Bucky Barnes, mcu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-01
Updated: 2017-06-01
Packaged: 2018-11-07 13:05:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11059587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fynndin/pseuds/sleepyoceanprince
Summary: Bachelorette parties are basically expected to go a little above and beyond the normal. That Carol would deem it necessary to reveal her super powers to the Avengers on hers, that the stripper she hired as a cheesy joke would get into a gunfight with a HYDRA agent or that Captain America would turn up still was beyond Jennifer Walter's imaginations for even the worst of worst case scenarios when she had agreed to be the maid of honor and organize the party. In hindsight, mixing up a good alcohol-free punch seemed like a rather manageable task.





	Love Goes Through A Man's Stomach

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SailorChibi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorChibi/gifts).



> The universe is basically MCU at some not further specified point in time between CA:TWS and CA:CW. Tony knowing Carol is less of a canon divergence and more of a headcanon. I presumed he got to know here before she became Captain Marvel, roughly the same way as he did in the comics, when she became part of some R&D-project from SI because they needed top class pilots for test runs. Jennifer Walters just turns up because I love her and Carol being awesome friends. She's also kinda free form, because usually she is very small when not hulked out but I wanted her to be tall.
> 
> Tony's alcohol problem is never openly addressed in MCU, but I think it was hinted heavily. This fic is past-recovery but the problem itself is briefly mentioned two or three times.
> 
> Undeniable canon divergence: Bucky is a stripper. He's also the Winter Soldier. It will make sense, trust me.
> 
>  
> 
> This is for SailorChibi's SpringFling-prompt "Bachelor Party"
> 
> I'm not actually sure, that is what you had in mind, but judging by your likes and dislikes and what you usually write, I figured it should work out just fine. It also may have gotten a little out of hand re: length. I hope you enjoy it. I definitely had fun writing it :D

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Pepper asked and fixed his collar - that certainly wasn't even sitting wrong - for the third time. "You haven't been to any party of that kind in forever. I mean, the last time ended in an alcohol fueled disaster and you don't do that kind of stuff anymore."

Tony put his hand over hers where it was still resting on his collar bone. "Are you saying, you're worried I'd get black out drunk and puke on the carpet like I'm a stupid teenager?"

Pepper rolled her eyes but turned her palm up to squeeze his hand. "Not that it would be beyond you, but let's just say your ability to stay out of trouble didn't increase since you joined the Avenger." She paused to look into his eyes. "And I don't have to know what kind of trouble you will get into to be worried."

"I'd like to deny that-" he inhaled through his nose. "- but I don't see on what grounds. But Rhodey is coming, too, and we both know that he cares about me as well and is practically my voice of human reason. And he'll sure as hell make sure I don't get drunk. Or puke on the carpet. Or both."

Pepper actually smiled at that. Then she sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. "Fair enough. Though I know what human reason looks like when you and Rhodey are out together. Just try not to get in trouble tonight, ok?"

"And here I was, planning to get attacked by a maniac with a laser raptor tonight" Tony sighed and threw his hands in the air. That earned him a stern glare. He dropped his hands and let his head hang a little. "Not funny, right? Too much of a real possibility. What even is my life." He stepped around Pepper to pick up his jacket from where it hung over the backrest of her office chair. "Yes, Ms Potts, I will try not to get into trouble, and if I do, I will try to get out and wait for back up. Sounds good?"

"Yes, it does" she said, and let out a breath she must have held since the beginning of the conversation. "Thanks Tony. And have fun." She got back behind her desk. 

Tony wondered briefly why she got back into her office chair at 9 pm but decided that he shouldn't judge anyone's working hours. "Have a nice evening" he replied and left.

~~~~~~~

 

Carol was standing at the door of the bar she had presumably booked, dressed in the most cheerful unicorn costume Tony had seen to date. She also did her best to look annoyed. Unfortunately, her best did not manage to ban the glint from her eyes and to keep the corner of her mouth from twisting upwards.

"Very appropriate, dressed for the occasion, I guess?" Tony asked, letting himself get pulled into a welcoming hug.

"Yeah, I'm afraid this party will be a little below your usual standards. I hope you'll have fun anyway" she replied.

Tony looked over her shoulder into the crowded bar room. "Regarding dress code: Yes. Regarding company: Definitely not. If your bridesmaids have any sense of people, they can't possibly have invited anyone who's worse than a group of old, white lobbyists with a superiority complex."

She let go of him and shrugged. "I mean, they did invite you."

Tony put his hand on his chest and gasped. "You wound me. Why do I hang out with you again?"

"Because I'm a sparkling unicorn and I enthralled you with my magical charm" she said with a remarkably flat voice and pressed a button on the collar of her costume. An array of LEDs began blinking in a dazzling pattern all throughout her rainbow colored mane.

After he managed to stop laughing at that, Carol patted his shoulder. "Jokes aside, I'm glad you could make it, Tony."

He smiled at her. Sometimes her humor was a bit harsh, but he still liked Carol. "So am I. So, you gonna be caught here forever like that, greeting all the late comers?"

"Nah, the girls said I can stop whenever I want, but it's fun to see some of my guests look conflicted about whether or not they can laugh at the 5' 11" Air Force Captain in the sparkling unicorn costume." She was sporting a face splitting grin now. "You just go inside and have fun, I think I'll play the receptionist unicorn for another half hour or so and then we'll probably get to the embarrassing party games. Oh and the green punch is non-alcoholic." 

Tony waved his thanks and entered the main room. Considering how early he was, the room seemed already crowded and the party going rather well. He headed over to the aforementioned punch and got an overview of the people on his way. He spotted Rhodey talking to a tall, brown haired woman in a pencil dress. After filling a glass with the drink that came with pieces of kiwi, watermelon and grapes, he headed over to them.

Rhodey introduced him to the woman who went by Jennifer and was one of Carol's bridesmaids. Then went back to an apparently heated debate on the plausibility of centaur anatomy. Tony shook his head, but then decided to side with Jennifer. Her stance wasn't any more or less ridiculous than Rhodey's, but he wouldn't pass a chance to ruffle his best friend's feathers a little.

When it almost seemed like they had convinced Rhodey that a two-heart blood circuit would make much more sense for a centaur, Jennifer spotted something, turned around towards the dance floor and waved over everyone's head easily. "Now for the fun part" she said, made half a step and stopped in her tracks to consider something, looking back at Tony and Rhodey. She tapped her lip and added: "I'm sure you two can appreciate places with a good view", linked arms with the two of them and dragged them across the hall.

A part of the dance floor was freed of people by who seemed to be the other bridesmaids and -men and Carol, now without the ridiculous costume, was seated on a chair facing the emptied space. She slouched between the armrests and had one corner of her mouth drawn up. She seemed pretty confident that the party crew would not overstep any lines and totally embarrass her. But they would try to get close to it.

Tony glanced over to Rhodey where they had been dropped of at the front of the gathering crowd. "Stripper?" Tony asked.

Jennifer stepped onto the improvised stage and tapped a mic that - of course - immediately triggered feedback. She frantically took two steps away from the closest amplifier and covered the mic with her hand.

Rhodey smirked back at Tony. "Definitely a stripper."

Without further feedback loops, Jennifer gave a short speech on how they wanted to give Carol a last good look at what she would swear off by getting married to a woman. Tony glanced over at Carol, who seemed to be amused, judging by the wolfish grin and relaxed pose. When Jennifer ended here speech on "so we invited someone for you", Carol hardly let her finish before she threw in "Yeah, he better show me some abs, hon!"

That got her a good laugh from the crowd. The same laugh died very quickly when upon the very first heavy beats of the bass, the announced stripper entered the stage. And enter he did. No flawless grace, no elegant swaying - instead a guy built like a brick wall strut across the floor, carrying a dance pole in one hand without visible effort aside from the flexed forearm and shoulder. He jerked the pole upright and hardly waited for it to stop swaying before he turned around to face Carol, carded his fingers through his hair to push it back and lowered his head. 

When he raised his gaze, the white of his eyes sparkled in the stage light, giving a harsh contrast to his almost black smoke-smeared looking make up. With the slight hunch of his shoulders and flexed arms, he had the air of a predator ready to attack. A series of shivers ran down Tony's spine as he imagined to be the focus of that glare.

When the guy finally ended his murderous glowering, Tony managed to drink in his physique and appreciate the elaborate cut of his clothes. On first glance they might have passed for practical clothes combined with some light combat gear. Upon closer inspection, the boots were far too clunky to be practical, but made the guy as a whole look leaner. The pants were wide around the shins and knees and had sewn-on pockets, but around the thighs and buttocks they were tight enough to reveal pretty much everything. The black vest looked like it had protective plates. In fact it probably just had padding that imitated even bigger pecs and abs, when really the guy had to have enough of these to be damn impressive on his own.

The guy discarded the vest in a similarly practical and rough manner as he had placed to pole and revealed a coarse, seemingly heavy-duty t-shirt. It was nonetheless tailored to hug around his slim waist and dip into the kink between his pecs. Yes, definitively still impressive, Tony thought. 

While the guy strut over towards Carol, the pounding bass faded a little to make way for more synthesized sounds that mixed well with the roller coaster ride Tony's mind went for. As the music slowly shifted towards a more racing melody and the lights synchronized with it, the guy fell into rhythmic and definitely more suggestive movements that included long strokes up and down his torso. Tony swallowed and wished the desire to trace his hands after the man's own could be gulped down as well.

The stripper kept the sinuous movements up for a few cycles and on the next bass drop ripped off his shirt in one quick motion. His forearm bulked up, tense with the force he used on the fabric and the shirt ripped with the loud and satisfying sound of thick, dense fibers being torn.

Next to him, Rhodey chuckled and whispered: "You're gone man." Only then Tony realized that his mouth was hanging open. He should get a grip on himself, but then again, how could he when this guy was dancing around only meters away from him in nothing but cargo pants that showed of a gloriously sculpted ass and heavy boots. And if Tony's eyes weren't tricking him in the low light, the guy had just winked at him.

~~~~~~

Shit. Shit, shit, fucking Christ on a goddamn pogo stick. He had avoided all and every high society events he ever had been asked to perform at and also generically turned down anything in the vast vicinity of Manhattan and yet, if Bucky wasn't completely mistaken, there were Tony fucking Stark and James goddamn Rhodes standing in the front row, eyes glued on him. 

At least Stark's eyes were glued on him. But luckily so far more to his shoulder than to his face and Rhodes seemed to be busy making fun of his friend. So apparently there was an entirely different motivation to make this show a good one than just payment. He suspected that neither of them would recognize him under all the make up anyway, but if drawing attention to his body was what would keep him from being discovered tonight, then by god, he'd do that.

As a tiny speck of luck in this ridiculous pile of disaster, they were both standing close to Carol, so he could go with his routine, appropriately focus on the celebrated person and at the same time make sure Stark and Rhodes didn't get too good of an overview of him. Also, tilting his head and looking the other way were easily included in his performance. The parts where he swirled around the pole like there was no tomorrow where safe anyway. He wasn't wearing more than a thong and boots now. Also while he hadn't sweated much so far and his skin had the perfect amount of friction on the pole, most positions were still straining enough to make his muscles bulk with tension. That probably helped with the distraction.

If you asked Sebastian Stag - he'd picked worse undercover names, but not many - he'd assure you that he gave his best at every show. Today he had to admit that maybe he gave a little more than he usually did and apparently it paid off. When he got close to the end of the performance, he threw in a wink towards Stark. The man looked like he wouldn't get back to thinking for the next half hour and Rhodes was still busy teasing him. 

To his delight, Carol Danvers on the other hand seemed impressed by his skill, but otherwise unglazed. Funny as bachelor(ette) parties were to attend, he hated the instances where the person of interest was either too embarrassed to even look at him or so smitten, he'd have to fend them off later to avoid being part of any actions of infidelity.

He was just working on disassembling the pole, when an entirely different kind of problem sauntered over to him.

"I'd tell you about how spectacular you show was, but I'm sure you already know that, hot stuff" Stark said.

Bucky bit his tongue to avoid swearing on a reflex and tried his best to make it look like the screw he was working on was hard to get out. After he had drawn as many seconds out of this excuse as he could without it looking ridiculous, he started to pull on the pole, conveniently covering most of his face with his forearm from Stark's perspective. "People mentioned it occasionally" he answered eventually and kept his voice flat.

"Occasionally? For shame." Stark picked up on everything. Except for Bucky's obvious vibes of not-interested apparently. "They should be waxing poetry over it. They should write odes to the power you can put in your step and hymns about what you can do to a man just by looking into his eyes."

"That man happen to be you?" Bucky said and hardly put in the effort to make it sound like a question.

"Tones, leave the man to it. He probably got troubles enough without you" Rhodes stage-whispered from the side.

'Yes, listen to this wise man's wise words' Bucky thought to himself. Tony chose just this moment to bend down to the base of the pole. "I think you forgot to get the second screw out. Let me..." he began and reached for the screw driver Bucky had dropped next to his foot.

"No!" Bucky exclaimed, maybe with a bit more insistence than strictly necessary. He grabbed the screwdriver and only thanks to his good reflexes twitched sideways to also avoid touching Stark's hand. Would be just his luck to get discovered now just because the flesh colored sleeve he had gotten for his metal arm did still not feel like skin or soft. He decided to give Stark an apologetic look through his bangs. "Sorry, I don't mean to be rude. I just have had bad experiences with explaining to clients why their guests suddenly helped me with the clean up." He began to unfasten the second screw. "I know you're volunteering, but it looks unprofessional on my part, so please don't."

"Fair point" Tony admitted and took a step back. Well, maybe half a step. 

While the second screw was coming off, Rhodes stepped in again like the god sent miracle he tried to be: "Good, and now we could also stop bothering this man who is still busy working and go grab some punch, maybe talk to Carol or something?" He slung an arm around Tony's shoulders. Then he whispered, low enough that with average hearing Bucky would have missed it: "Are you seriously flirting with a stripper right now? You had enough chances to figure out that's a bad idea, but lemme tell you again: That's a damn bad idea."

After being on and off this job for a while now, Bucky had gotten enough shit about it to get a sudden urge to give Rhodes a piece of his mind on that one. The problem really should not be that he was a stripper, it should be that he was a service worker on the job and regardless of service, you were not supposed to flirt with them. But as a service worker on the job, Bucky was also not meant to give people lectures on their ideas of life and social stigma, so he took what he could get, gracefully ignored the whispered part of what Rhodes had said and shot him a thankful glance. Stark finally, finally gave in and left Bucky to it.

When everything was locked together and an easier-to-carry fashion, Jennifer, the woman who had ordered him for this party, came up to him. "That was a tremendous show, Mr Stag. We maybe hoped to get a bit more of a rise out of Carol, but eh. Should have guessed it. You were amazing" she opened and handed him an envelope while speaking. "This would be the second half of your payment. With a little extra. Also, I don't know if this is how it's usually handled, but if you want to, feel free to stay for a while after packing up? The bar is open and I hardly think the guests would mind. Though, if you want to leave, that's fine."

He did want to leave. He wanted to get as fast and as far away from Stark and Rhodes as possible, but he wasn't here just to make some quick cash. He looked around under the excuse to estimate the crowd. This place was hell to observe and cover from outside. The inside on the other hand was one single, unobscured room with only a small storage room behind the bar, two rest rooms and an honest to god trap door leading to the basement. From inside, keeping an eye on everything was a cake walk.

"I'd love to, Ms Walker" he said. "To stay for a bit, that is. No other appointments tonight and if the people here are fine with this...?" She nodded. "Nothing wrong with a bit of a party to end the night."

"Sure" she said. And that seemed to be that. She left him to sorting out the rest of his gear and hauling it back into his van.

Luckily there wasn't that much more to do so a mere 15 minutes he had changed into clothes that were at least a little more comfortable than his stage outfit. Just a little, though, he still had an image to keep. He sauntered over to the bar, ordered a beer and turned around to lean against the bar and have a good overview. Everything was going great so far. The crowd was relatively calm for a bachelorette party. Bucky took a sip from his bottle and relaxed a bit more. Maybe nothing would happen after all. But the night was still young and his intel had seemed reliable.

"So now that I shook off Rhodey..."

Bucky almost groaned. He did drop his head a little after all, but covered the movement by taking another sip from his drink. And to maybe give Stark a hint that he was not interested. He should have looked for an observation post outside after all.

"I really just wanted to pay you the due compliments for that show" Stark explained. "Nothing weird. Just that. And maybe chat for a bit."

Sadly chatting for a bit was the entire problem. Bucky was reasonably sure that during a straight up make out session or even sex, he had a lot more options to distract and divert attention. Also, now that he got a good look at the man, he wouldn't particularly mind distractive sex with Stark. Wrong direction of thoughts. "'m not the chatty type" he said before the silence got too weird.

"Well if that isn't the opposite of a problem" Tony told him with a wide grin. "I get told that I must love to hear myself talk, so I guess I can speak for both of us - no pun intended - and just keep this going."

Bucky let his head drop back, glared at the ceiling and let out a sigh. "Ain't a good listener either."

He waited for a come back. He waited for anything. Nothing happened. Eventually he turned to look at Stark to see him looking somewhere at the floor next to Bucky's feet.

"I'm... Look I didn't want to annoy you" Stark rambled. He didn't look up. "Not sure why I didn't get it earlier, that you- yeah whatever." He sighed and finally looked back up to Bucky's face. He still didn't quite make eye contact. "I guess in your job you get enough idiots hitting on you. I should have listened to Rhodey. I'll leave you to it then."

With the distinct impression of a kicked puppy, Stark turned around and walked away. He really felt bad about the situation, about getting on Bucky's nerves. That took Bucky by surprise, but he filed it away as currently irrelevant data. He contemplated going after Stark and telling him it was ok. He had not kept his cover this far just to blow it on a whim, so no, he would not do that. He looked after the man for a moment, still. 

He took a deep breath and let it out again. With it he pushed away every thought of Rhodes and Stark being here to finally focus back on his real job. He was just dragging his eyes away from the back of Stark's head, when he spotted a shadow behind the window two meters in front of the man.

Bucky barreled forwards, pushed Stark out of the way and distantly registered some word of protest from him but that same moment the window in front of them exploded into a flurry of shards. Luckily he had managed to shield his face with his arm. Bucky registered that one shard had dug into his right forearm and several had hit but not torn through his pants. He pulled two pistols from the holster hidden at his sides and fired four shots towards the person trying to jump through the broken window. It was close enough for Bucky to not actually need to take aim, thus had had time to quickly look around the room.

Of course, panic erupted immediately but aside from that he spotted another attacker entering through the window on the opposite wall and a third one was pushing aside the helpless and clueless woman who had been greeting guests at the door. And if he wasn't completely mistaken, the trap door was lifted a little, so he had to expect a fourth one. He had to give them that - what HYDRA goons lacked in skill and training they tried to make up in planning. Tried to.

Second window guy trained a weapon at him. The one at the door, judging by the direction he looked into, was trying to get to Carol. First attacker was hopefully down, so Bucky threw one of the bar stools across half the room and hoped it would at least get into the guy's way. He turned around and did the first few steps to avoid being a stationary target when he realized that second window guy wasn't trying to take aim at him but at someone else instead.

"STARK!" Bucky shouted and at the same instant jumped into the way, fired his right gun into the direction of the goon and yanked up his left arm to cover most of his face. The goon went down when Bucky landed a hit into first his knee and then his head. Still, he had fired a shot and Stark's pained shout went somehow right into Bucky's stomach, lighting up his nerves along his spine.

He half stumbled, half landed on his side with a dull thud, immediately pushed himself back up again and looked around for the other attackers. The other two he had seen before had reached Carol who was punching one of the straight through the wall while charging some ball of light in her other hand. That had not been in the files Bucky had found on her. He had expected a well trained but ordinary human woman with exceptional flight skills, but this made a little more obvious why HYDRA had plotted an assault on her.

He saw Rhodes taking on another attacker who had turned up at a broken window, with some pocket-device that seemed to work like one of Stark's repulsors. He also heard Stark's voice saying something about backup. Stark, who was shooting him sideways glances and seemed fine.

Bucky's legs were a little shaky. How had Stark's scream made him react almost physically? He put a hand on his stomach and when it suddenly felt wet, that explained a thing or two. Bucky lifted his hand to his face and saw it drenched in blood. "Oh" he said and felt his legs give in. Before he felt the anticipated impact of hitting the floor, everything had gone black already.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony finally had an idea of what was going on. Nonetheless he had already pulled out his phone and dialed up the Avengers emergency channel number. "You guys have my coordinates. HYDRA agents, I have no idea what they want or how many are still coming. Rhodey has taken two down with his repulsor watch and apparently Danvers has some powers I didn't know about. Also, and I can't believe this is my life, the stripper jumped between me and one of the greenheads and literally caught a bullet that was meant for me. I need an ambulance, the guy's currently bleeding out on the floor... Yes, that's what I said. I ordered my suit to get here. If the ambulance takes too long, I'll fly him into medical, you got me?" While talking, Tony had activated his own repulsor watch, but currently he was surrounded by panicking guests and couldn't have taken aim if he tried.

Steve had said something on the other end of the line and Tony had totally missed that one. "I don't care, just get here asap, Rogers." He dropped down next to the stripper. He had to get a name on him. Calling him the stripper in his head made the situation even more surreal. 

"Fuck, don't die on me" he mumbled as he started stripping off his jacket while trying to keep hold of his phone. "Don't you dare dying on me." He crumpled the jacket into a ball and put pressure on the wound as best as he could. "Steve, I'm out, I won't let this man die. Get your asses over here." He dropped the phone and ignored the distant squawking of someone still speaking on it where it lay on the floor.

"Come on, come oh THANK the gods!" Tony exclaimed as the man beneath his hands sluggishly opened his eyes. Someone got down on their knees next to Tony. From their gestures Tony understood that they offered to take over pressing the jacket onto his rescuers wound. He glanced over. The person looked like they actually trusted in their medical experience to do this better than Tony with his years old first aid course as only base. He gladly handed over the duty and turned to the half-conscious man at his knees.

"Hey, it's ok, help is on the way" Tony said, keeping his face directly of the other man's so he didn't have to look around too much to see Tony. "Well, nothing is ok to be precise, but you're going to make it. You'll make it and if I have to carry you to help. But I guess the ambulance is a little easier on you. They're coming."

"No." The man coughed more than he spoke. "No ambulance, not- not hospital."

Tony gestured around aimlessly, keeping himself from touching the man's face in an attempt to calm him. "Look, I hate hospitals, too, hated them since my early youth and always, but you need medical help." When the man gave him a wild, almost desperate look, Tony picked up his hand to stroke over it. "I'll pay all the bills, if that is what you're worried about. All of them and whatever you deem fit for doing this for me." He squeezed the hand gently.

He tried to squeeze the hand.

Under some kind of rubbery-smooth layer, the hand was rock hard. "What is this?" he asked more to himself.

"Whu?" the man asked and lifted his head ever so slightly before dropping back to the floor. "'S my hand. Or wha's this 'bout?"

"Your... hand" Tony repeated and looked at the man's face and paid real attention to it for the first time. He knew that face. "Bucky" he whispered.

"Yeah, what now?" Barnes slurred, still half out of it.

"Bucky Barnes?" Tony asked, clearly audible this time.

"Yeah 'm here. Whadda ya-" Bucky opened his eyes. "No. No, I'm... I mean, yes. I-" He pushed himself onto his elbows to the sheer terror of the person who was still trying to still the bleeding on Barnes' stomach. He shook his head and going by his face, almost blacked out over it. "Stark, I can't- can't stay here." He drew a shaky breath but held up a hand before Tony could continue. "Either I'll end up in the cell of some government research tank or I'll end up with you guys." He was wheezing between every other word but he continued: "'S you see 'm not safe to be around. You'd all be in danger from HYDRA" - he coughed before he could get more words out - "in danger from me as well. 'm not clear. And Steve-" He looked at Tony with the most pain struck expression Tony had ever seen on someone else. "Steve must hate me. YOU must hate me."

That was it. Tony pressed him back down onto the floor. Maybe Barnes tried to resist, but he didn't exactly have much left to resist with. "I don't even know what you're talking about." Tony pressed the jacket back onto the wound. "What I know is that you are talking too much. No talking with stomach wounds." There was a familiar alarm sound coming from his ear bud. Armor incoming. "And no public hospitals for friends of the family."

He felt the armor assemble around him. This wouldn't do. If he carried Barnes, no matter how, the man would probably die halfway to the medical bay, healing factor or not. Tony looked around. Carol and Rhodey apparently had fought off the rest of the attackers. A lot of guests had fled the scene already, the remaining ones were sitting together in tiny groups, comforting each other and waiting for the police to arrive. As expected, the War Machine armor had arrived roughly the same time as the Iron Man one.

"Hey Honeybear, you don't mind?" Tony said just loud enough to be heard across the room. Rhodey hadn't even time to ask what he didn't mind before Tony had already sent the override codes to the War Machine armor and steered it to fold gently around Barnes, pressing the cloth lump into the armor with him.

"No, of course I don't mind, everything for my friends" Rhodey mocked, but Tony was already on his way to drag the other armor with him out of the bar. "Thanks for asking and yes, I would like to know what that was about" Rhodey shouted after him. Tony filed that away for later and focused on flying while at the same time transferring according commands to follow and keep stable to the War Machine armor. Seconds later he saw the Avengers' quinjet touch ground next to the bar. At least that was taken care of.

Tony decided to also care about telling Steve about this later. He'd just panic and if there was anything they didn't need more of right now, it was panic.

When he reached the medical bay, the staff had already gotten his message and prepared the surgery room and tools. Of course they did not ask for circumstances or anything, really. They were used to and paid for far higher levels of weirdness and disaster. Two nurses quickly and with certain movements peeled Barnes out of the armor. He seemed to be drifting into and out of consciousness as they laid him out on a surgery table to prepare him. All the while, the head of surgery, Dr Hanson, and his assistant tried to talk to the man and apparently got the information they had been looking for.

When they went over to the sinks, Tony heard the anesthesiologist talk to the head surgeon in a muffled voice. He got something about anesthetics and super soldier serums. Right, that was usually a problem. To Tony's knowledge they had something around that could knock Steve out, but apparently nobody was sure if Barnes had been injected with the same serum and needed the same treatment.

"Mr Stark?" Dr Hanson suddenly stood right beside him. Tony smoothly played over the minute surprise and gave the man a smile.

"Any problems? I dearly hope you can save him." If there was a sharp edge to his voice, he wasn't sorry.

"Regarding surgery, yes. With his healing powers, worst case is that we have to keep him on blood bottles until he healed all by himself, just to keep him from bleeding out, but in fact I wanted to inform you, that Mr Barnes wished to not be put on any drugs that would render him unconscious."

Tony needed a second to process that. "He wants you to stitch up some of his internal organs while he's fully awake?"

"That's what he said. Normally I'd refuse that request on principle, but things here are a little different, so I figured that I'd ask you first."

After a second of consideration Tony figured there wasn't really much to consider. Tony fought tooth and nail for agency over his own body, so he wouldn't deny that to anyone else. "Then do what you can to dampen his pain and don't knock him out." It spoke for Hanson that all the reply Tony got was a nod and then the surgeon went off to do his job.

A nurse stepped up to Tony moments later. "Dr Hanson said, we should make sure, Mr Barnes is distracted during the surgery. From, you know, noises mainly. And uncomfortable tugging that he might still feel." Tony thought about that for a second and then decided that he had a good enough idea of why that would require distraction. "He said he'd like to talk to you." When Tony gave her a puzzled look, she explained: "Mr Barnes. When asked about distraction he said he'd like to talk to you. If you would come with me, I'll help you get clean for the surgery room."

That would imply the full load of hospital smell, hospital clothes and hospital rooms, but Tony had promised to pay all the bills. If the bill for surgery included him getting into scrubs and playing deviator, that seemed like a fair price to pay. It still didn't make the request any less strange. But since Ms Diez was an excellent nurse, he didn't have all that much time to brood over this. She practically manhandled him into scrubs when he was too slow, made sure he scrubbed his hands correctly and long enough, and covered his hair with a fabric cap.

While buzzing around him, she explained to him that they had put Barnes under some kind of anesthetic that would numb his lower body and something that paralyzed anything from his shoulders down. It sounded creepy as hell to Tony, but certainly a lot better than going through internal surgery with the full, undampened amount of pain.

When Tony got in, he was greeted by Hanson and his team, standing around a human trunk and legs, upper body shielded from view by a medical tent. Under the expectant glances of four sets of eyes, Tony rounded the table, tried not to register the plate full of surgery tools and finally stood in front of Barnes.

After a moment of awkward silence, Tony opened with the most eloquent comment he could come up with: "So." He genuinely didn't know what else to say.

"You meant that about liking my show?" Barnes asked.

Tony probably gaped like a fish. He also found roughly as many words as one. This was not what he had expected. "Yes?" he tried eventually.

"And here I was hoping for this sweet talking flatterer to come and distract me from my pain" Bucky groaned.

From the other side of the tent, Hanson asked in a slightly insecure tone: "Can we begin now?"

Barnes let his head thud against the metal table. "Yes, for the love of fuck, get this over with." After a moment he added: "Please", but behind the tent, Hanson had already started clicking away with some of his hellish tools and started muttering demands to his team.

The change in tone tore down something in Tony's head and he managed to pick up the pace.

"Yes, the show" he said and remembered to put on his best seductive smile. If for whatever reason Barnes wanted flirting, he'd get flirting. Tony'd bring the most A-game he could muster up while being dressed in green pajamas and drenched in desinfectant. "I'm not sure if I'd call it a show. Maybe more of an attempt to convince me, and trust me, I am convinced."

"Convinced of what?" If not for the clenched teeth, Tony wouldn't have known that Barnes was not just chilling on that table. A blink later, Barnes had a mischievous, hungry glint in his eye. Sadly, Tony also got awfully aware of the smacking, wet sounds of whatever Hanson was doing, underlined by the beeping sound of assisting machines and the anesthesiologist throwing in numbers and specs.

"My first bet would be: Convinced of stripping off the rest of your ridiculously revealing clothes with nothing but my teeth and then see what parts of your body react in which ways to my tongue. But ultimately after that act, you could have convinced me of anything just by asking nicely."

Barnes' eyes suddenly went wide and he drew in a huge breath, discomfort obviously written on his face. An assistant doctor lurked around the tent. "I'm afraid I have to ask you not to expand your ribcage like that, Mr Barnes. It puts tension on your stomach area." Barnes nodded tensely, then licked his lips and swallowed before looking back up at Tony. "Sorry. Someone tugging at your guts feels a little weird, even when they are numb."

"Shit, distraction" Tony said as he awoke from the feeling of helplessness the soundless scream had thrown him into. He tried to summon up the end of what he said last.

"Actually, can I-" Barnes stretched his hand towards Tony. "Feeling something haptic would be good right now."

"Wha- Oh yes, sure" Tony stammered and the caught Barnes' hand in his. "Sorry, I never thought I'd say that, but apparently there is a situation where I'm not good at flirting."

"You mean standing next to a surgery table and listening to the soft sounds of someone's intestines being stitched up like a Christmas turkey?" Bucky joked. At least he tried to sound like he was joking. It came out a little strangled and the amusement in his voice was wobbly at best. He shivered violently and the grip around Tony's hand tightened.

"That would do it" Tony said, nodding in agreement towards Barnes' hand. "Actually." He looked back into Barnes' face. "What I actually meant was, when I'm genuinely interested."

That got him a look of utter confusion. At least that apparently came with distraction, but Tony still felt a certain obligation to explain. "Flirting is very easy, when I'm just seeing something - sorry - someone who looks nice and fancy and I think to myself: Hey, for a night or two that would be awesome. But when I'm actually really interested in a person, as - well as a person..." He started gently massaging the back of the hand he was holding. "Rhodey always claims that I could never be speechless. But I am. Right now. When I try to flirt with you, I don't have a single idea, what to say."

Now it was Bucky's turn to gape like a Karp on land. "Are you saying, you...?"

"Yes." Tony lifted the hand he was holding to his face and leaned one of the fingers against his nose. "It probably sounds fake because what the hell do I even know about you. When I saw you at the party, all I felt was desire. Want. To, you know, tap that." He shrugged, trying to play over the insecurity that was clawing at him. Bucky looked a little puzzled but nodded either way. "But right now what I want to do is sit here for hours and try to describe the beauty of the storm grey of your eyes. I want to play with your hair while I do that. Card my fingers through it."

Bucky gulped. Was Tony going too far, too early? Or maybe just in the completely wrong situation. But he couldn't find it in him to stop.

"I want to press my face into your hand and feel how warm it is." Slowly, giving Barnes every chance to draw away, he pressed the palm of the hand he was holding to his own cheek and felt his stubble being pressed into his skin.

"I want to touch every inch of your face until I know what it feels like by heart so I can feel it in my dreams. I want to massage your feet so I can hear you moan. Somehow I expect you to moan beautifully once I found the right spots." Bucky was gaping again and somehow Tony hardly saw him breathe. "I'm freaking you out, right? I'll shut up and-" He dropped Barnes' hand. The hand didn't drop. It hovered right where Tony let go of it and when Tony moved, it took hold of his wrist. Very firm hold.

"It's only thanks to my extensive secret mission training that my pulse is not through the roof right now, Stark. Cause that would certainly disturb surgery" Bucky opened. "And that's not from freaking out." He tugged and Tony came back closer again. "I can't say yet if the feeling is mutual, cause usually I can tell that from the fuzzy feeling in my stomach and right now my stomach feels like someone is sticking huge, pointy objects into it and kneading it into a new shape."

Hanson huffed a laugh on the other side of the medical tent.

"But I can tell that I don't want you to stop." Barnes' eyes flickered from Tony's left to his right eye and back. "Please stay and tell me all the sweet things you want to do." His mouth twisted into a dirty smirk. "And if you run out of sweet things to say, continue with the dirty ones. I'm sure you got plenty on your mind and medical personnel is used to hearing worse."

"True" one of the assistants said and got promptly scolded by Hanson.

"If this is what you want" Tony said, mainly to get a few seconds to recover his previous line of thinking. He was a little worried that he'd run out of things to say. After being worried about this for seemingly forever but talking the entire time, Dr Hanson stepped around the tent.

"We're done" he said while stripping off the latex gloves. "I'd suggest to keep the spinal anesthetic injection going for that time." Hanson gave Barnes a moment to object but when nothing came, he continued. "Usually it takes an hour or two to wear off anyway, but judging by the readings the anesthesiologist reported, you'll need a constant, low volume flow of drugs, otherwise your system would clear it out within minutes. And I can assure you, you don't want to have full pain reception back in the next hour, even at your healing rate."

He absentmindedly started helping his assistants with taking down the medical tent while talking. "No reason not to put you into a proper bed though. I'd just recommend" - he turned his head to look at Tony sternly - "to stay in that bed and not remove any of the tubing or bandages."

Barnes turned to Tony as well. "What?" Tony asked incredulously.

"Finally I'm back with the reasonable people who don't stay in their hospital beds" Barnes mused. "You also have a habit of umping out of planes without a chute?" Tony raised an eyebrow to that. "Almost feels like home now that I found myself even another idiot without any self preservation."

"Oh no, no, I'll have you know I'm nothing like Rogers" Tony insisted when he finally got it.

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, but I already feel home" Barnes cut into his words.

The assistants arrived with a mobile bed and disrupted their banter for a moment to heave Barnes from the surgery table into the bed while telling him several times to stay as inactive as possible to not stress the seams. After that was done, they started rolling Bucky over into one of the medical bay bedrooms that Tony distantly remembered from the blue prints. It probably hadn't been used ever before.

One of the doctors shortly gave Bucky a rundown on what the remainder of his treatment would be, unhooked all but one tube and a few ECG-electrodes from him and then left the two of them alone.

During this intervention, Tony had been struck by an entirely different question. "If you don't mind me asking, why did you not find a better cover than getting to the party as a stripper? I mean, you have been an... active field agent for quite some time."

Tony had expected a light hearted, maybe joking answer but got a heavy sigh instead. Barnes looked up at him. "That wasn't strictly speaking a cover."

There had to be a connection or a hint Tony just didn't get. He stared at Barnes.

"Hypothetical scenario: You have a very limited amount of cash. No living address, no bank account, no certificates that say you're a citizen of the states or even just a legal person. And in this hypothetical scenario, the only thing you did for a living for the last 70 years was killing people, but you somehow lost the thrill of that. Off of the top of your head, what job would you pick to make some cash?"

Tony was silent for a few more moments. "Right" he said, mainly to fill the silence. "Ok, let's pretend I didn't ask that."

"Why? Do you think the same about strippers and show dancers as your friend Rhodes?" Barnes looked downright pissed right now.

"Wait a minute" Tony interrupted. "What has Rhodey to say in all of this?"

"I heard how he warned you that getting involved with me would only be trouble, maybe even shameful." Tony needed a moment to remember what that referred to but then it dawned on him. Barnes was raging on already. "I didn't always enjoy the job, but my colleagues were never the problem. More people like you, like him who looked down at us and-"

"Hey" Tony cut into the tirade and picked up Barnes' hand again. "Hey, slow down, please." He hadn't even thought about it but suddenly he was cupping Barnes' cheek. He was still glowering, but he was listening. "What he meant was not you or any of your colleagues being trouble or being shameful. Nothing like that." Tony realized just now how weird it really was that he was touching Barnes' face like this and withdrew. "That one was on me. Entirely on me. I have a history of making bad decisions when I flirt with people on parties. Not the choice of people. More like... the aftermath of flings."

"Oh, that is-" Bucky stammered. "Can't say I get that, I was always good at them" he said and shot Tony a charming smile. "But yeah, I guess that was unfair towards Rhodes." He sighed. "At any rate, that's the story. I went to that party in particular because I had found snippets of plans of that assault, but the stripper part was real."

"Not what I expected, but I guess I shouldn't complain. After all it brought you here." Tony looked down at the hand he was caressing again. He dropped it immediately. "Oh, if this is weird, I mean you don't need more distraction, right?"

Barnes looked at him like he wasn't entirely sure, Tony was real. "You're something else, aren't you. Now take my hand again already." That was a demand Tony didn't have to be told twice. "I don't know what you take me for, but I can't listen to you serenading me for what must have been the better part of half an hour and then not feel something."

That needed a moment to sink in. This time it was Barnes who gently stroke Tony's hand. "Did I just dream that?" Tony asked.

Barnes rolled his eyes. "No you did not, tinhead. You're cute. You're handsome. And you should fit my thing for reckless idiots just fine."

"I can hardly deny that, so thanks, I guess."

"And while I can't feel much there right now, there may be a bit of a tingling in my stomach" Bucky said and tugged on Tony's hand until he sat down on the bedside. Tony was more than okay with lending his hand as some kind of fidget toy for a while, feeling how Barnes' fingertips mapped out the welts and ridges on his own palms and fingers.

"So we're going to try this?" Tony asked reluctantly after a while.

"I wouldn't object" Bucky said and glanced up at Tony.

Tony definitely had that fuzzy feeling in him and maybe even felt a little light headed.

They both twitched when the door opened and Dr Hanson entered without paying any attention to them holding hands and staring at him like a pair of deers in the proverbial headlight. He picked up a file from the bedside table, scribbled a few numbers from the monitoring computer down into it and then turned to Bucky. "May I?" he asked and gestured towards Barnes' midriff. 

"Um, sure" Barnes said.

Hanson gently peeled off a sticky bandage and inspected the seams. The skin underneath looked like it had healed for at least several days already. He pressed gently on the sides and then put the bandage back on. While scribbling some further remarks into the file he said: "As expected, the healing is going very fast. I'd suggest you stay in bed until tomorrow noon. I'm going to lower the amount of anesthetics going in now. If you should start feeling pain within the next minutes, let me know and I will increase the dose again." He punched a few numbers into the computer by the bedside and adjusted some numbers on the screen.

He gave Barnes a last once-over, then he dropped the file back onto the table and slid his pen back into his breast pocket.

"I'll leave you to it then" he said and with a tiny smile left the room and carefully closed the door.

"So, want me to help you get unhooked from this and get out of this place?" Tony asked was already taking note of the machines and their points of contact to Barnes.

"I swear to god" Bucky groaned and lifted his head, just to let it fall back into the pillow again. "I know this seems to be a wild concept to people around me, but usually when a medical professional tells you to stay in a bed and to keep taking your medicine, it might be a good idea to do that."

"That sounds fake, but okay" Tony deadpanned.

"Does it now?" Barnes tugged Tony's hand closer to him and continued to trace shapes onto the palm. "I think it's worth a try. And while I wait for my ordered rest time to be up, how about you sit here and let me figure out, what I would like to do with you?"

"Would that by chance involve a kiss?"

"Possible." Bucky smiled, almost a little shyly. "Quite possible."

**Author's Note:**

> Whoever you are, welcome to the end! I hope you enjoyed this fic. If you did, maybe leave a comment or come visit me on [tumblr](www.sleepyoceanprince.tumblr.com)


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